Most of my coaching clients know they want to do something or have something – whether it’s a promotion, or a career change, or to reclaim work-life balance – but they feel stuck in some way. And it’s usually because of how they’re perceiving their situation.
Two areas that come up again and again as sticking points for my clients are TIME and MONEY.
For TIME, it could be…
- “I don’t have enough time to do what I want to do”
- “It’s too late for me to do what I want to do”
For MONEY, it could be…
- “I don’t have enough money to do what I want to do”
- “If I do what I want to do, I won’t have enough money”
5 Steps to examining your perception
In this exercise, take stock of perceptions you have, evaluate how true they are or aren’t, and think about what options you have moving forward. Use the category of TIME or MONEY if it resonates with you, but feel free to use another category if it’s more pertinent.
Step 1: Identify a sticking point
Write down something have been getting in your way when it comes to getting what you want to have. Use the following format:
I haven’t done X because I don’t have Y .
Step 2: Examine your reasoning
Check your reasoning by asking yourself,
“How true it is that I haven’t done X because I don’t have Y ?”
For example if you said, “I haven’t made more money (X) because I don’t have the right college degree (Y)“, then ask yourself, “How true is it that I don’t have the “right” degree?”
Are there other ways you could look at your situation that would make that reason less true? In the case of thinking you don’t have the right degree, you could ask yourself, “What other reasons are there why I think I don’t have more money?”
Step 3: Examine a different perspective
Consider look at your situation from another angle. Ask yourself,
“If I had Y right now, what’s something important that would bring me?”
In the example above, you’d ask yourself, “If I had the ‘right’ degree, what’s something important that would bring me?”
Maybe it’s not just more money that’s important to you. Maybe you’d like to have more subject matter expertise. Maybe you want respect from your peers. Or to feel part of a bigger network. Or something else.
Step 4: Study your options
So where do you go from here to get unstuck? Ask yourself,
“What are some other ways that I could get the important things that having Y would bring me?”
Are there other ways you could get the subject matter expertise you want? Or other ways of getting the respect of your peers?
Step 5: Reflect
What have you discovered?
What are you more aware of now?
What resources do you have right now that could help you to make progress toward getting what you want?
Stay tuned to Cambio Coaching on social media for the final day of this 7-day series!
TOMORROW: Day 7 – Effecting Change
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